Take Another Road

“Take another road to a hiding place. Disappear without a trace. Take another road to another time...Never look back, this is my plan...Leave my fears behind...Take my own sweet time...Ocean's on my mind.” ~Jimmy Buffett

As I sat around today reflecting, I realized that Thanksgiving has truly become The Last Holiday and with the news of my grandfather slowly slipping away from this earth, I went out last night with a purpose...a purpose to forget my troubles and I succeeded.  I was trashed within hours.  It happens when you mix tequila, crown, & vodka.  I woke with a slight headache & the queasies.

I also woke up with a message that my grandpa had passed away earlier in the morning. He went peacefully and quiet. Just like he was when he was alive.  91 years young.  1 loving wife.  6 kids.  12 grandkids.  15 great grandkids.  That’s quite a life...that’s a great life.

I’ve decided that I’m looking for a new tradition on Thanksgiving...I think I’m going to call Thanksgiving, The Last Holiday from here on out.  Celebrate the lives of the ones gone.  I’ll take another road like the song lyrics suggest and perhaps find an ocean to sit and stare out at.

W.R. Taylor

Today, Saturday, November 27, 2010 @ 8:15 am W.R. Taylor passed away at the age of 91.

Rest in peace Grandpa.  You will be missed but never forgotten. 

Below was originally posted on Wednesday, November 24, 2010 but updated today

Who is W.R. Taylor?  He is my grandfather.  William Ross Thomas Taylor or Willie Ross Thomas Taylor.  To me, he was just grandpa.  I’ve been a horrible granddaughter.  I haven’t visited when I should have or called when I should have, but my grandparents are never far from my mind.  My family is never far from my mind.  They are my family.  They are what motivates me.

I have very fond memories of my grandpa.  Spending hours in the spring helping him plant his rose bushes and tend to his garden.  Washing his car for a $1 so I could go to the country store for penny candy.  Watching him shovel a handful of nails into his mouth so he could work on whatever piece of furniture he was upholstering.  That always scared me.  What if he swallowed a nail?  He never did swallow a nail.  I’ve only heard him say two cuss words in my entire life and I’m sure I must have dreamt those.  He was a man I went to church with for thirteen years.  Every Sunday, he’d drive around the town, picking up his grandkids and load us all into a vehicle and we went to church with Grandpa.  If you got a thump on the back of the head, you were misbehaving and boy could his arm reach across a pew.  No matter where you sat, he could reach you.  I enjoyed those Sundays with Grandpa.  He was there with his gaggle of grandchildren.  He had 10 of us to care for throughout the Sundays.  My grandpa also made the meanest most delicious breakfast in the world.  He was a cook in the Navy and boy could the man cook.  No one can scramble eggs like him.  No one can make bacon as crispy as him.  If you were a grandkid and you spent the night with him & my grandma, in the mornings you’d hear “Rise and shine. Time to hit the floor.”  You were told once.  In fact, I’m not sure any of us grandkids ever stayed in bed long enough to hear it twice...we would be up in a matter of seconds...brush our teeth, dress, and be at the breakfast table.  I remember going to the grocery store with my grandparents and then just with my grandpa when my grandmother couldn’t make it.  I remember borrowing his Cadillac, his pride and joy, and pulling into the garage from the right vs the left and scrapping all the chrome off the right side of the vehicle.  I sobbed for hours.  I knew he was going to hate me for the rest of my existence.  He didn’t, he told me stop crying and let it go.  He never called my mom Lek (rhymes with deck) but Leak and he never called my aunt Dolorese but Dorsie.  His only daughter (5 boys and 1 girl) wasn’t called Gloria but Sister and we still call her that.

Grandpa was a man who loved, who never had an unkind word, who worked harder than anyone I knew, and was a man that believed in faith and in God.

My dad sent me a text a couple of nights ago, letting me know that he wasn’t doing so well after his last return from the hospital, and that if I wanted to, that I should go visit him.  My dad knows me and said if I didn’t want to visit, then I didn’t have to.  There are images in my head of people and I want to remember them a certain way...not the way that life makes us look at the end of our time.

My sister & my nieces went to visit today.  Sister (my aunt) said he probably wouldn’t talk or acknowledge us.  When I saw him, I almost broke into tears.  Physically he wasn’t the same man, but spiritually, he was.  There is an essence about my grandpa.  He fills a room.  He’s the patriarch of the Taylor family.  He is a legend to us.  I sat with him for a while.  The Andy Griffith Show was on the TV and he was staring at it.  It was as if I was a kid all over again.  Watching him, watch the TV.  I talked to him like he wasn’t 91 years young.  When I left him, I said “I love you Grandpa,” and he said “I love you too.”

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring the Taylor family, but as I watched his two oldest children (Sister & Michael) go through paperwork that dealt with funeral arrangements and such, I do know that my grandpa lived a great life.  He’s still married to his lady love, Ruth, who is in the bed next to him. He raised 6 good kids, helped raise 11 good grandkids, and though his great grandchildren might not get to experience what us grandkids experienced, he will still touch them.

And if he happens to slip into the good night without me seeing him or talking to him again, I at least know that I got to tell him that I loved him one last time.

Grandpa, I love you.

~Love your Scooter.

Grandpa, Riley, Grandma - Thanksgiving 20??

Grandpa Taylor, Riley, Grandma Taylor - Thanksgiving 20??

The Last Holiday

Who knew that last Thanksgiving would be my last Thanksgiving with my mom?  Who knew it would be the last holiday I ever spent with her?

Thanksgiving wasn’t a huge holiday in our family.  My mom didn’t eat turkey.  My dad was on the road.  My sister has her in-laws, and before all that happened, we still didn’t do a traditional turkey day.

Last year though, I had just moved into my apartment and wanted my family over and Kathy and her family over.  I wanted to say thanks to everyone.

This year...I just don’t want to be around anyone.  I’m grateful for all the invitations and support, but my head’s a mess and it’s a mess that doesn’t want to be around people.  I plan on curling up on my couch with my dog and watching a Mythbusters marathon if it’s on or all the DVR’d episodes of Hawaii Five-0 again.

Holidays just aren’t the same anymore.  No holiday is like the last holiday you spend with the ones you love when they were alive.

Listening to “Back to the Island” by Jimmy Buffett

Detroit Red Wings

A guy I met might have gotten me into hockey, but the Detroit Red Wings made me fall in love with the sport.  That was the team said guy liked.  That was the team that I learned about hockey from.  That was the team I cheered for and that was the team I followed.  Yes, I did decide to cheer for and become a NY Rangers fan as well, but this blog post is just about the Detroit Red Wings.

On Wednesday, November 24th, I will have finally seen the Detroit Red Wings play on ice. FINALLY!  It’s been on my bucket list of things to do.  One day, I will see the Wings play at the Joe Louis Arena or affectionately called The Joe.  Maybe I’ll knock that off my bucket list in 2011.  I missed all the games they played against the Carolina Hurricanes in 2009/10 due to scheduling, but when my passed away last December, I decided that from that moment on, life was too short to miss doing the things that make you happy or bring you peace.

So I’m gathering up my oldest niece and we are heading to HOT-lanta for some ice time and some quality time.  This will be her first EVER hockey game and I’m honored that it will be a Red Wings game.  I know she’s excited to be going on this trip, but I hope she becomes a hockey fan and a Red Wings fan.  I hope that she finds the game as thrilling and exciting as I do.  I hope that she forgets the outside world and all her troubles while she’s watching the game.  I hope she finds that certain zen I feel and get when watching the game.

There are three things that make me forget about the troubles, the feelings, the whatever is bothering me at the moment and that I am passionate about:  writing, music, & hockey.

So here I am being passionate & writing about hockey.  See, knocking out 2 passions in one post :)

A little run down on the Red Wings for those that are like who? what?

The Wings are currently #1 in their Division (Central) and #1 in their Conference (Western).  The Wings are 3rd in the League.

They have won 11 Stanley Cups and have some of the best players of the game: Nick Lidstrom, Pavel Datsyuk, Henrik Zetterberg, Johan Franzen, & I could go on!  (I haven’t even mentioned former great players!)

When a Thank You Card isn't Good Enough

Tuesday, November 16th, I will officially turn 1 year older (sorry to all you Facebook friends, you were early and I didn’t have the heart to tell you so, BUT thank you all for all the early birthday wishes.  You all rock.)

But, last night, November 13th, I had a party to celebrate my birthday at my favorite bar, okay, the only bar I hang out at...The Gin Mill.  It is my home away from home and my home away from work.  I’ve lost count of how many nights I have hung out there but I haven’t lost the counts of laughter and fun I have there.  They had booked a Jimmy Buffett cover band (one of my top five artists) and I figured, what the hell...let’s throw a party.

Instead of asking for a table to be reserved, I asked for my favorite corner of the bar to be reserved and Chris & the Crew hooked me up right...complete with sand, umbrellas, and enough Parrothead gear for everyone!

I can’t begin to say thank you enough to everyone which is why this blog is being written, but there are some people I need to give a shout out too.

The Gin Mill & Chris - thank you for all that you do for me...letting me crash your bar with my party, letting me watch hockey in the middle of football madness, and mostly for being the best damn bar in Charlotte.  With you, I’ve grown, I’ve laughed, I’ve cried, and have had a lot of memorable nights there.  Thank you!!!

Holly - though you could not be there, you were with me in spirit and your decorations were spot on!  Thanks for being wonderful and for being you.  I love you like a big sista!  Your friendship means the world to me!

Suzanne - thank you for being “mom” and making sure I was not super over indulged with shots.  Your shot time outs saved me from what surely could have been a train wreck of a night & remember, no one can beat our flavors. Fuck yeah!

Krissie - for cooking a kick ass meal and cupcakes and being my shoulder to lean on at 4 am. I’m so glad you were there to share my birthday with me girl.  Your friendship is a blessing.

Jennifer - last night was no Vegas, but it was right on par with how much of a great time we have when we get together and party.  Thank you for being a wonderful friend throughout all the years! Much love to you!

Kathy & Barry - our friendship has been over ten years and you guys have spent a lot of my birthdays with me. Thank you for adding one more to your belt! Love you guys!

In no particular order a HUGE GROUP THANKS to Tracy, Anthony, Patrick, Special Ed, Tracie, Rozak, DZL, Johnny, Jeff, Emily Beth, Jack Daniel, & Meg (and if I forgot anyone, I’m sorry I’m just going by the card) - boy do you peeps know how to surprise a girl! When I put the wish out into the universe for a ticket to the Rangers vs Caps game in NYC, I didn’t think the wish would really come true!  You guys are amazing and I can’t thank you enough for the ticket.  You have made the wish this Rangers fan and I will truly enjoy my first Rangers game at the Garden.  Please know, I love you all from the bottom of my heart and that you are fabulous.  I’m so glad to not only call you co-workers and friends, but family too!

Tracy - thank you for all that you did, the candy (which I will curse you ever time I eat), and for the Massage Envy card. You are going to go far in life and don’t ever believe you need to settle for anything other than the best of the best.

Emily Beth - thank you for being a shrimp...in real life and for dressing up as one last night.  Also thank you for the Massage Envy card too.  You might like 12 year old music, but you’re a stand up grown up!

Mike K - thank you for dancing with me. You have a spot on my dance card anytime mister!

Kevin F - my sunshine, my fellow Scorpio - thank you for dancing with me during “Pirate Looks at Forty” - dancing with one of my favorite people to one of my favorite Buffett songs was a blessing.

Courtney - Happy Birthday to my fellow Scorpio-Rabbit. May we celebrate each birthday together in person or in spirit!

And finally, because the list of those who were there is a mile long, thank you from the bottom of my heart to all of those that came out last night, bought me a shot, a drink, gave me a hug, said happy birthday and just had a great time.  Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Now as Jimmy Buffett sings “On the night wind that takes me just where I want. That's all I want La Vie Dansante.”

Thank you to you all one final time for “La Vie Dasante.”  I’m glad you are part of my “dancing life.”